Supporting Families After Hospice Care

Supporting families after a hospice death is about more than providing practical guidance

When a family member dies in hospice care, families can experience a complex mix of emotions, including sorrow, relief, and exhaustion. While hospice care is designed to provide comfort and dignity in a person’s final days, the support needed by families does not end at death.

The days following the loss can be overwhelming, and the compassionate assistance they’ve received throughout the last days, weeks or even months often comes to an end.

When my mum died in 2020, the hospice support leading up to that time was outstanding. However, I remember being given a cup of tea and some cereal just after she died, before packing up my mum’s belongings and heading home.

After a couple of calls about funeral directors and what I wanted her dressed in, that was it. I know not all hospices are like this, and many have excellent initiatives in place.

In the immediate aftermath, families may feel a sense of shock, even if the death was expected. Hospice staff play an important role in offering reassurance that the person who has died had a peaceful ending, or they were comfortable.

Providing clear guidance on the next steps, including contacting a funeral director and obtaining the necessary documentation, can help alleviate some of the stress. It is equally important to allow families the time and space to say their goodbyes in whatever way feels right for them.

Once the initial formalities have been addressed, ongoing support becomes crucial. Families may need reassurance that their feelings are valid and that grief is a deeply personal experience.

Hospice teams, including social workers and bereavement support professionals, can assist by ensuring that families have access to appropriate resources.

Some struggle with feelings of guilt, particularly around decisions they made regarding their family member’s care. Offering gentle reassurance that they acted with love and in the best interests of the person who has died can help ease these emotions.

Practical support should also extend beyond the initial days. Many hospice services provide bereavement follow-ups for up to a year, ensuring that families are not left feeling isolated.

A simple phone call to check in can be a powerful reminder that they are not alone.

Bereavement support groups and educational resources, such as ours, can also be valuable in helping families understand their emotions and find ways to cope.

The way we communicate with grieving families is as important as the support itself. Words of comfort should be chosen carefully, avoiding well-meaning but unhelpful phrases, such as ‘They’re in a better place now’ or ‘Time’s a great healer.’.

Acknowledging their pain and allowing them to express their emotions without fear of judgement is one of the most compassionate things we can do. Sometimes, simply being present without the need for words can offer the greatest solace.

Supporting families after a hospice death is about more than providing practical guidance. It is about recognising their loss and ensuring that they do not feel alone in their grief.

By offering continued care and understanding, hospice professionals can provide meaningful support that extends beyond the final moments of a person’s life.

We are here to support you through our free online resources and our team of grief professionals. Please get in touch to book a call.