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Writer's pictureGrief Specialists

Why Time Doesn't Heal All Wounds

True healing requires a willingness to address emotional wounds head-on


Time has long been touted as a magical solution that can heal even the deepest emotional wounds. "Give it time," they say, "and you'll feel better." While there's some truth to the idea that time can help us cope with pain and adversity, it's important to acknowledge that time doesn't heal.


You wouldn’t wait for time to heal a broken leg, you’d take the action of going to hospital to sort it out. A broken heart and shattered emotions shouldn’t be any different in our minds. Taking action will help you to work towards healing.


Unresolved Emotions

Time itself doesn't possess the power to resolve emotional issues or trauma. If we ignore our feelings or avoid confronting the pain, time won't automatically make things better. In fact, suppressed emotions can fester and lead to further suffering.


How to Help: Face your emotions by starting to talk about them, seek support from friends or a therapist, and spend some time doing some self-care activities, such as going out in nature, reading a book, writing, art, gardening, whatever brings you joy!


Reinforcement of Negative Patterns

If we don't actively work on changing our thought patterns and behaviours, time can inadvertently reinforce negative habits. For instance, time may allow us to settle into a cycle of self-pity, resentment, or anger.


How to Help: Question your negative thought patterns, practice self-reflection, and consider professional support or self-help resources to break free from your destructive cycles.


Lingering Resentment

Time alone won't make resentment disappear. Holding onto grudges and anger can intensify over time rather than dissipate.


How to Help: Practise forgiveness as a way to release yourself from the burden of resentment. This doesn't mean condoning hurtful actions but letting go for your own peace.


Unaddressed Trauma

Trauma can leave deep scars that don't magically vanish with the passage of time. Without professional support, the pain is likely to carry on.


How to Help: Seek trauma-informed therapy to address the root causes and find healthy coping strategies.


Grief Doesn't Follow a Schedule

Grief isn’t on a timeline, and it's not something that can be rushed. The pain of loss may persist longer than we expect, and trying to speed up the process can be counterproductive.


How to Help: Start acknowledging what you’re feeling and give yourself permission to grieve at your own pace, seeking support from people you’re close to, or a grief specialist when needed.


Inaction

Time can't heal what we don't actively address. If you're stuck in a painful situation or relationship, merely waiting for time to pass, won't lead to healing.


How to Help: Take action to change your circumstances, make decisions that serve your well-being, and seek guidance if necessary.


The Importance of Self-Care

Time can be more effective in healing when accompanied by self-care. Neglecting self-care can hinder your progress and make the passage of time less beneficial.


How to Help: Make self-care a priority in your life, ensuring you engage in activities that nurture your physical and emotional well-being.


Time Doesn't Heal All Wounds

While time can play a role in healing, it's not a standalone solution. True healing requires active participation, self-reflection, and a willingness to address emotional wounds head-on.


By acknowledging time doesn't heal all wounds and actively seeking help and support when needed, you can truly move toward a place of healing and growth.


So remember, time alone doesn't heal - it's what you do with that time that makes the difference. You can find a grief specialist to help you from our directory.

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